WHAT IS UP PEOPLE.
So, I have about 5 days left until I go home for winter break. SO excited. I still can't believe the semester is ending already, though. It's crazy; I feel like I just started college a couple of weeks ago, and now I'm starting to pack up for home. I know, it's such a cliche to say such a thing, but I can't help it, since this is exactly how I feel.
This semester wasn't the greatest though. Sure, I met a whole lot of interesting people at my college, but despite having gone through an entire semester here, I still don't feel like I fit in. It would be just my luck to befriend people who are too busy for me anyways. I honestly don't want advice on any of this. I've heard all of it from almost everyone I know, and I feel like I'm listening to a tape recorder when people try to cheer me up about this. I honestly have no motivation to try to make more friends here...I mean, since the people I'm surrounded by (not all of them are this terrible) are not really the best people. Last week, I sat scared in my room because about 5 drunk assholes were banging on my door, trying to get me out to party with them. They were calling me stupid pet names, like, "baby, sugar, hottie" ...etc. I was literally scared out of my mind. My RA wasn't available at the time, so I was stuck in my room until they left...which took an extremely long time. That incident was my last straw. I have decided to transfer out of my school at the end of the year, hopefully to end up in a better one for next year. I promised myself that I would try joining clubs and that I would do my best to be involved as much as possible before I transfer, so no one should worry about reminding me to do that. It's honestly just something that I must do.
I really learned a lot about myself these past few months, and even though things haven't been so great, I found ways to cope with these negative feelings. For one, I've been drawing more. I haven't exactly touched my sketchbook recently, due to the huge amounts of work that I've had to do in my classes, but I have made more pictures. I will upload them eventually, probably over the winter break. As well as drawing, I have also been writing some songs. For me, this is almost entirely new, since I never really knew that I was capable to writing something that I was proud of. The songs that I have written really reflect my feelings, and in a way, writing has become a new outlet for my creativity. I feel so blessed to have discovered this about myself. In a way, I feel that if I never went through any of these negative experiences at college, I would have never started writing. It makes me very happy, and I can't wait to get home and write/record more songs, as well as fill up the empty pages in my sketchbook. I'm excited to see what I'll be able to do over the month-long break. Just one more obstacle to get over: finals.
Well, I really hope that everyone enjoys their break, and I also wish everyone luck on their finals/midterms...if you guys have any. Until next time, see ya!
Listening to: First Choice - Gabe Bondoc
Reading: My unfinished essay about Clark and Plato